Quote for the Day

“Whatever you give a woman, she’s going to multiply. If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home.  If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal.  If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart.  And if you give her any crap, you will receive a ton of shit.”

Love and appreciate all the women in your life.

Thanks Gramps!

If you havn’t seen Carnation Milk is Best of All, check it out for another good laugh.

Here is the email:

A cute little lady from Iowa had worked in and around her family dairy farm since she was old enough to walk, with hours of hard work and little compensation. When Carnation Milk became available in grocery stores (in the 1040s), she read an advertisement offering $5,000 for the best slogan. The producers wanted a rhyme beginning with ‘Carnation Milk is Best of All.’

The cute little lady, at that time a cute, little girl, thought to herself ‘I know all about milk and dairy farms. I can do this!’ She sent in her entry and several weeks later a black limo pulled up in front of her house. A man got out and said, ‘Carnation loved your entry. So much in fact, we are hear to award you $2,000 even though we will not be able to use it.’

Here is the add she came up with:

HA HA!! This is is GREAT!! Carnation totally messed up by not using this add. It sure sold me!